Grounded

Tonight I experienced the feeling of security in the universe. It came in an odd place and in an odd conversation. The conversation and experiences of the evening were grounding. Life may be tumultuous. I don't know where to start with all there is to do. I miss previous lives that I've had, and I miss my girlfriends from Santa Cruz. I hope that my experiences tonight continue to unfold and continue to ground me in truth.

Owning My Life will become a reality by the end of this year. I will continue to make mistakes as part of it, but I want to understand my failures as lessons and move forward with Balance.

The Bottom?

Well, I am now putting myself through an informal bankruptcy and just put my family through a foreclosure. Have I learned the lessons I was supposed to learn? Who knows. What is someone supposed to learn. How does a person change behaviors and attitude about money. You think it would be easy to say, "That was stupid, let's not do that again", but somehow the cycle has continued in the past. This last cycle had a real bottom to it.

Just Do It - Seems simple enough. Yet somehow, procrastination and bad habits have continued.

I don't think I can fall further than I have.

Now I have to climb out. Is it possible? Is there a mountain that will have a beautiful view from the top, or will it just be one valley after another?