Scattered

I just woke up from a dream and wanted to write it before it disappeared. It's funny how fast that can happen.

I had a new job at the coffee shop, and it was the same coffee shop that my husbands boss went to every morning.

It was my first morning on the job, now I've worked coffee before, so I know that it takes preparation and practice to do things right and to be able to get drinks out the door. It's about quality and quantity when it comes to a coffee house in the morning.

Well, I only had 2 orders, a mocha and a house coffee. To start, I couldn't find any of the cups. There were cold coffee cups, and mugs to stay, but no hot coffee cups. The other employees didn't seem to care or understand why I couldn't find them. "There just right over there," one of them said. Another said, "Well, there usually here. Maybe we need to wait for the delivery." I replied that my customers were waiting now. And again there was a lack of caring. "Oh well, it will just be a few minutes."

So, I decided to start making the espresso while I waited for the cups. When I went to the espresso machine, none of the old grinds had been cleaned out. The old grinds were laying ontop of the shelf and still inside the brewer. The grounds had turned to clay and no matter what I used to wipe it off with, there was more on the brewer each time. I desperately searched for another machine in the store and found one, but it was too tall and I couldn't reach it.

It was about this time, when Eric (my husband's boss) came back in for his drink and I just looked at him and tried to make excuses. I blamed everything I listed above, said I was sorry, but felt hopeless and aghast that I would even have to tell my customer all of these things. Eric just looked at me with a look in his eyes that I can't quite determine. "Well, I guess I'll just have to get a time schedule on my drinks from now on." I felt humiliated. He would go back and tell my husband. My husband would know that I'm really no good. That I just pretend.

Someone was in line to order at the coffee store. He ordered something I had never heard of. He explained to me what it was and I said I would try. I said it with the tone of voice and demeanor that already had determined I would fail when trying to make this new drink.

As I began to wake up with the memories of this dream, I realized this is how I'm operating in my life. I realized this is how my employees feel because of me. I'm the only one that give them the tools, knowledge and material that they need to do their job right. If I don't, my employees will have that same feeling I had when Eric looked at me because I didn't have his drink ready.

Only I can change this in my life.

Only I can change this for my store and how my employees are able to operate.